How long will I be picking up the pieces

Finally updating on my Awesome-tastic Wednesday!!

My friend Amy and I had tickets to the Pick Up The Phone tour featuring Blue October. Blue October is one of my favorite bands and I've been eagerly waiting for them to come to San Francisco. I'm pretty sure I bought my tickets the second they went on sale. LOL.

While Blue October was in town, they did a short acoustic set at Crissy Field for Please Don't Jump. This group was created to help save a San Francisco resident who sent in an anonymous postcard to Postsecret threatening to throw themself off the Golden Gate Bridge this summer.


At this event, there were speakers from the Suicide Hotline as well as family members of 2 people who took their lives jumping from the bridge and a bridge jumping survivor. He jumped from the bridge 10 years ago today and is grateful to be alive and is working towards building a suicide barrier to prevent anyone else from joining the list of 1500 known jumpers who have died.


Here's one of the songs they sang. Should Be Loved.


It was a very beautiful event. We were invited to sign the banner.



After this event, Amy and I killed some time by hanging out in Crissy Field since it was a gorgeous day, then headed downtown for lunch at Max's Opera Cafe and get in line for the 7pm concert (which ended up being at 8, but whatever). We got really great spots in the venue. We were at The Regency Ballroom. There's no handicap seating (Amy's in a wheelchair), but we got there early enough to get a spot in the front row at the left side of the stage. We were OK there for a while, but this ignorant girl standing in front of Amy kept backing into Amy and accusing Amy of ramming her in the ankles. I almost punched the bitch out. If I hadn't been so excited to see Blue October, I would have. She was so damn rude, I couldn't believe it.

The concert was awesome!! The energy was amazing. Justin Furstenfeld is one of the best performers I've ever seen. He and Jared Leto take the cake. They live their lyrics, but Justin really takes it to a whole new level. He writes everything that he feels. A lot of it is real dark and most of Blue October's fans are people who have experienced a lot of those dark feelings and thoughts he's had. This is the second time I've seen them live and was just as amazed and blown away as the first.

Me and Amy


Justin (we were SUPER close!!!)


Here's my video of "18th Floor Balcony". This is one of my favorite songs of theirs.


After the concert, we waited around back to see if we could maybe get an autograph.....WE DID!! And got pics with Justin!!



He squished his face on my face!!!! OMG! I had my arm around his sweaty back and his was around mine. OMG. Swooooooon!!!!


After that epic day, I have been on a serious awesome letdown. LOL. I don't know how any other show will top this day.

If you want to see the entire day in pictures, click here.

Breeders

Ugh. Why do people even care that Michelle Duggar is pregnant with her 19th child? Why do people wish she would die or that her uterus falls out every time she gets pregnant? Why is it your business?

The Duggars aren't using government resources to raise their children. They make their own money (apart from their TV show) and aren't in debt. Everything they have they own outright. The Duggars are raising their children to be upstanding citizens. In all the shows I've ever seen, I've only seen the children under 3 years old throw tantrums and that's because they're too young to reason with. They're not raising Bebe's kids. And, they're not even using your tax dollars to educate their children - they homeschool!

Yes, having that children might seem excessive, but obviously Jim Bob and Michelle are still in love after 20+ years of marriage and enjoy doing it all the time. The result of this is babies. Good for them!! Not many of us are as lucky!


I made a similar post last year when they announced their pregnancy for baby #18 and I'll make this post every time she gets pregnant.

Let's all direct our anger towards Welfare moms who continue having babies and are bleeding the system dry! Let's direct our anger towards parents who don't parent their children - letting them run wild in the streets and disrespect everyone they come in contact with. Let's direct our anger towards those who deserve it!

Fat Ass!!

Ok, so I just need to vent for a minute.

I'm watching yesterday's Oprah. Her featured guest is Kirstie Alley. The topic: Kirstie's weight gain after she lost 75 pounds on Jenny Craig.

Why am I upset? Because this is just further telling women of the world that we are worthless if we aren't a size 2! This is absolutely disgusting. We've watched Oprah's weight go to extremes in both directions over the 20 years she's been on television. We understand that women struggle with weight issues, but why is that?

BECAUSE SOCIETY TELLS US WE'RE EVIL, DISGUSTING SLOTHS!!!

This isn't true!! Women were once praised for having curves - it was a sign of health and wealth. Now women who are so skinny that you can see their ribs and their collar bones, hip bones, and shoulder bones stick out are the ones that we are supposed to aspire to be.

It's complete bullshit!!

Everyone's body is different. Not everyone can actually be a size 2. Or even a size 4. Hell, not even a size 10! Not every body wants to be that weight!

I've struggled with my weight nearly my whole life. Since I was 10, I've been called every fat name in the book because I wasn't "normal" or "attractive" to other people. It wasn't until I was far into my 20's that I realized that if someone doesn't like me for what I look like, then they can go somewhere else!

My body likes to hover around 250 pounds. Now I realize that I am out of shape. I can't run a 5k. Hell, I can't run 50 feet. But why do I need to run 50 feet unless it's from some axe murderer? I've had bloodwork done. My cholesterol is just fine! My triglycerides are just fine! The ONLY issue is that my blood pressure is slightly elevated, but you know why? Because I smoke. Yes I plan on quitting, but that'll be on my own time.

My body is just comfortable at this weight.

I once weight 195 pounds. That was when I was 18 and I spent the summer before my senior year at fat camp. I worked out 6+ hours a day and ate 1100 calories a day. THAT'S NOT REALISTIC!! I have to fight so hard to be skinny to appeal to the world, but you know what? I DON'T CARE WHAT THE WORLD SAYS!! AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU!!

If you feel the need FOR YOURSELF to be thin because it's what makes YOU feel better, then do it. But do it for yourself and yourself only! Do not do it for someone else!

Often I do wish that I weighed less, but only by 10 or 15 pounds (cuz that's what I've gained since I stopped working and my pants are a little snug). Occasionally I wish that I was a size 10, but that's ONLY because finding cute clothes in larger sizes can be difficult (but that's going to be less of an issue once Revolution1228 is launched!!).

But, honestly, 95% of the time I am perfectly happy with the way I look and often think I'm hot.

Now, all that being said, if you're at an unhealthy weight - where you can't walk or drive a car or your cholesterol is through the roof - then obviously you need to lose a few pounds for your health. But if you're overweight AND otherwise completely healthy, then take a good look at yourself and tell your reflection that you are beautiful and you don't need to change!

I'm so sick of seeing so many women put themselves down because they're not thin enough for some guy, or not thin enough to be an entertainer, or not thin enough for any reason influenced by the outside world.

The number 1 opinion about yourself that you should value is your own.

I have a crush

It's an unlikely crush, but I spent most of last night dreaming about him.

I'm talking about Michael Phelps. Yes, you read that right. I have a fatty crush on Michael Phelps. LOL. I dreamt that he was my friend and we were hanging out and for no real reason, we started holding hands while sitting on the couch watching a movie. This scene repeated a few times as though it were several days that he came over to "hang out." Then, on like the 3rd or 4th day, we kissed.

This is highly unusual because, while he is an attractive guy, he is 6 years younger than me and he has bad teeth. LOL. I am a snob when it comes to teeth. I don't like crooked teeth. They creep me out and Michael Phelps has messed up teeth. LOL. I know! I know! I'm weird. LOL.

I think this is a result of OD'ing on the Olympics.