Ugh!

I think I'm just destined to have bad luck with dating.

So I've been talking to someone for a couple weeks now. We met after a week of talking, spent like 12 hours together, had a good time, but I did take him home. That was so stupid and I knew at the time it would be, but I did it anyway. I really expected him not to talk to me again, but he did. I had him over at my house a couple days later. We watched TV and slept together again.

Since then, he continues to talk to me, but it feels strained. It feels like he's too busy to talk to me or to hang out with me. In fact, I asked him if he wanted to hang out tomorrow afternoon since I've been dealing with a migraine today and wouldn't make very good company tonight. He said "Maybe. Dunno what I'm doing tomorrow." And that he wasn't available Friday because he would be getting his son for the weekend starting mid-day. So I asked why we couldn't make plans for tomorrow since he wouldn't be available for several days after that, and his response was "Well I have to work n dunno when I'll be done. Not sure what I'll have to do after that."

Am I wrong, or does that feel like the brush off? I already called him out on the brushing off yesterday because he only ever asks to hang out after dinner time and when I mention that I'm off on a particular day he still doesn't seem to get the hint that I'm telling him I'm off so we can make some sort of plans to hang out.

He's already stated that sometimes he can be kind of oblivious to things like that and doesn't take subtle hinting very well, but, to be honest, either he's REALLY dense or he just doesn't give a fuck if I'm around or not.

I'm so ready to just give up. I don't chase men. That's not my job.

I'm so confused. I don't know what to do.

But my vicodin is kicking in, so I'm gonna head to bed. But first, maybe a piece of cake. LOL

Umm...what?

Haven't done one of these in quite a while....

Here's my WTF video of the year!

Ouch, my freakin head...

So I've been suffering with periodic migraines for several years now. They used to be very infrequent - like once a year. Last year, I think, they started coming about once a month. Over the last couple of months they've been coming once a week. Today marks 2 days in a row. Usually these migraines are worse right before and during my period, so I'm thinking my hormones have a big influence on triggering them. I've actually thought this for a while, but, as per usual, did nothing about it.

This morning I finally made an appointment with Planned Parenthood so I can get my girlie bits checked out and get BC pills. I haven't had this kind of appointment in probably 5 years. I'm thinking it's time. I usually go 3 - 4 years in between appointments anyway. LOL. I'm thinking the BC pills will help with my headaches. I always get the low estrogen onces because they help get rid of my cramps, too. Once my insurance kicks in (in about 4 more months), I'll make an appointment with a regular doctor and get my head checked out. It's not normal that my eyeballs want to jump out of their sockets once a week.

I'm so over these damn headaches. I probably need Imitrex. I'm also going to see if I can get a referral to an ENT and find out if I really do have allergies because some of my migraines stem from sinus headaches. I don't want to be a pill popper now, though. I hate taking pills and always forget (hence the reason I'm never on BC pills LOL)

Or maybe it's just a tumor.

Farther Down

It's so hard for me to post a lot of the time because I hate to be so whiney all the time. For the most part things are going well for me. I don't have much to complain about, but we all know I just love to complain. LOL

Work is going OK. I'm having a rough month so far with business, but there's not much I can control about it. Granted, the "suits" would disagree, but I'm the one who actually works in the store and knows what goes on. I'm dealing. I'm having a little stress that's causing me sleep issues (work stress causes insomnia), but I'm really working on leaving work at the office.

Home life is OK. Jenn's still looking for another job, but isn't having much luck. I feel bad for her cuz I know how much the company sucks. She and I are getting along much better, too. We have a normal friendship now, I think. LOL. We were dysfunctional for so long, in our friendship and with our relationship, that I didn't think we'd ever get to this point. It's nice.

Now my love life is something to complain about. LOL. The latest guy, the friend, is out of the picture. I'm not really surprised, to be honest. I don't expect any one to stick around for long. I did have hope, though, that since we already knew each other and had mutual friends, he wouldn't screw me over. Well, he didn't screw me over...he just screwed me and decided that's all he wanted and walked. This is why I've decided that I'm no longer giving away the milk for free. The next person that wants in my pants is gonna have to buy the damn cow. I'm just so tired of allowing myself to be treated this way. I'm so much better than that and I deserve better.

Physically I hurt! LOL. My leg muscles have been crampy lately and I'm not sure why. Mostly, though, over the last 2 days, my right shoulder and upper back have been hurting like a bitch. I need a full body massage - any volunteers??

That's it for the time being. Hope that wasn't too whiney. LOL.